May You Awaken
May 26th, 2017 by Kimberly
Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.
CARL GUSTAV JUNG
via Gratefulness.org
So much in life confuses me, and nothing more than my own actions sometimes. Paul talks about it in the New Testament, in Romans: “For I do not do the thing I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” Been there, Paul. Many times. I think we all have. Despite truly wanting to go down a certain path, we find ourselves going just the opposite way.
Maybe we grew up with a certain relationship dynamic and now we perpetuate it. Not on purpose, just because it feels familiar. A friend told me this about the worst moments with her children. “You find yourself doing things the way your parents did even if you didn’t want to, because in times of stress, you go back to what you know.” But just knowing that much is a huge step toward becoming the person you want to be. One of my therapists pointed this out. When you’re doing things without realizing it, you can’t change anything. When you begin to see yourself repeating a pattern, even if you don’t feel like you can change it, you’ve seen it. That’s a start. You’ve realized that you are in the matrix. That’s the first step to conquering it.
As Stuart Smalley would say, time to take a swim in Lake You.
Most people have trouble looking inside themselves, and I get that. It’s fascinating and also completely terrifying, because you’re afraid you won’t like what you see. That’s why it helps to make this journey with a wise counselor, loving friends and hopefully a huge helping of compassion for yourself. Done properly, looking inside yourself can help you understand not just your actions but other people’s too.
Kimberly finds her own lake deep, murky and/or refreshing, depending on the day.