Kimberly Emerson

This is one column I really wish I didn’t have to write, but I do.

In case you didn’t notice, there’s been a brouhaha in Michigan.  Earlier this week, the Majority Floor Leader of the Michigan House of Representatives, Jim Stamas, banned two elected officials from speaking on the House floor, claiming their comments were “inappropriate.”  One of the comments that occasioned the ban could subsequently be found on almost every major news outlet.

I’m flattered that you’re all so interested in my vagina, but no means no.

– Lisa Brown, Michigan Representative

The statement was made during debate on a bill that would make all abortions after 20 weeks of pregnancy illegal, with no exception made for the health of the mother.

The other bannee was Rep. Barb Byrum.  Rep. Byrum hasn’t made nearly as much press, probably because she was banned without ever officially speaking in the first place.  Most likely, Rep. Stamas banned her for speaking out of turn because she repeatedly yelled requests to be recognized to speak about her amendment, which would place restrictions on vasectomies that are similar to the ones being placed on abortions.  (Things like making it a crime to coerce someone into having a vasectomy.  Ridiculous for both abortions and vasectomies, because coercion, “intimidation of a victim to compel someone to do something against his or her will,” according to the legal section of The Free Dictionary, is already a crime.)  I say that as a hypothetical, because Rep. Byrum wasn’t told exactly why she was being banned or for how long.  She was told of the ban not by Rep.  Stamas or his spokesperson, but through the Minority Floor Leader, Rep. Kate Segal.  (Maybe this is standing practice, or maybe the Majority Floor Leader thought she would take it better coming from a woman.  I don’t know.)

You can probably figure out who the Republicans and Democrats are in this scenario, but I purposely didn’t identify them, because I couldn’t care less.  (Side note: this is the appropriate use of the phrase, people.  “I could care less” implies that you actually do care, at least a little.  Paid for by The Committee to Stop People from Contradicting Themselves Unintentionally.)  On the other hand, I have concerns about why these particular women were banned from speaking at this particular moment.  Evidently, so do other people, because the Speaker of the Michigan House Jase Bolger’s spokesperson, Ari Adler, gave the following explanation:

It is the responsibility of the Majority Floor Leader, the presiding officer and every Representative to maintain the decorum of the House. Majority Floor Leader Jim Stamas has informed Minority Floor Leader Segal that Reps. Brown and Byrum will not be recognized to speak on the House floor today after being gavelled down for their comments and actions yesterday that failed to maintain the decorum of the House of Representatives. Under Rep. Stamas’ floor leadership, the House Republicans have allowed more debate on the House floor than ever seen in the past few sessions when House Democrats were in charge. House Republicans often go beyond simply allowing debate by welcoming open and passionate discussion of the issues before this chamber. The only way we can continue doing so, however, is to ensure that the proper level of maturity and civility are maintained on the House floor.

Wow.

Did you read all the way through that?  I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t, because I started to nod off after it fell into blantant partisanship.  In case you missed it, let me call out the key phrase: These women failed to “maintain the decorum of the House of Representatives.”

Let’s see.  Okay, you could make the case for it with Rep. Byrum.  She spoke out of turn, evidently more than once.  I’m not sure what the proper procedure is to request speech on the House floor, so I can’t say whether she made any attempt to follow conventional means before resorting to forbidden ones.

With Rep. Brown, however – seriously?

Mr. Adler went on to clarify that the Floor Leader had not banned Rep. Brown for saying “vagina,” but for saying “no means no,” which he felt compared the abortion legislation to rape, according to a notation on Shine! Yahoo.  (It made it to Shine! Yahoo.  This sucker has gone viral.)

My favorite comment was from Rep. Mike Callton, who was quoted in the Detroit News  as saying “What she said was offensive.  It was so offensive, I don’t even want to say it in front of women. I would not say that in mixed company.”

I hate to repeat myself, but…wow.

I honestly think I’m even more offended by the real reason than I was by the fake one.

First off, and I direct this to all the men mentioned in this article, I’m sorry that a woman saying “No means no” offends your delicate sensibilities.  Truly.  You took this as an allusion to rape, and that distressed you.  I understand.  Rape is a traumatic event.  The act of another individual deciding against your will what will happen to the most private part of your anatomy is a horrific crime, and no one should ever have to go through it.  But the fact is that this bill feels a lot like legalized rape to many of us.  I’m sorry that’s so difficult for you, but to say otherwise would feel like a betrayal to many of those of us of the gender that will, you know, actually be affected by this particular piece of legislation.  (My apologies to all the men out there, and there are MANY, who have the empathy to get what Rep. Brown meant all by themselves.)

The sensitive Michigan legislators, however, in trying to protect me from this controversial statement, have completely ignored the part of this debate that actually does offend me.  Interesting fact about the statement “no means no” – it’s never said in a vacuum.  It occurs in conversation only when the person uttering the words has already said no, and was ignored. Funny thing about women – most of us have had to say “no means no” in much less public arenas, and for many other things besides rape.  No means no – you may not grab my butt.  No means no – I am not getting back together with you.  No means no – I will not accept half the salary you’re giving my male counterpart.  Similarly, in this instance, many of us who are card-carrying vagina owners have already said no, you may not criminalize our reproductive rights.   You didn’t hear us; ergo, we were obliged to repeat ourselves in a more forceful fashion.

Women can and do have many different ideas about what is appropriate when it comes to abortion.  You know what?  That’s how it’s supposed to be.  Legislators are supposed to listen to each other’s opinions, and then make their decisions.  Rep. Brown did not use foul language.  She didn’t throw a tantrum, refusing to leave the floor until Johnny Depp took her out for dinner.  She did not ask people to wear tinfoil on their heads because the aliens were influencing their decisions without making the proper political contributions first.  She just stated her opinion.  The Floor Leader and his allies do not have to like it or agree with it, but I do believe they have to listen to it.  That’s the way debate works.

Oh, and by the way, Mr. Callton, if you think “no means no” is offensive?  You better buckle up and make sure your seat is in the upright and locked position, because you are in for a very turbulent ride.  You’re talking to generations of women who were forced to listen to Bob Dole talk about erectile dysfunction on television.  The bar for what is appropriate in mixed company was lowered to subterranean level a long time ago, by folks on your side of the fence.  Way too late to bring it up now.

Kimberly is now going to try to figure out why Rep. Lisa Brown saying “no means no” is offensive, and Rep. Michele Bachmann saying that under President Obama’s health care plan, “If you are a grandmother with Parkinson’s or a child with cerebral palsy, watch out,” is not.  She may be gone for awhile.

Tags: abortion, banned speakers, Bob Dole, inappropriateness, Michele Bachmann, Michigan House of Representatives, Rep. Barb Byrum, Rep. Lisa Brown, sexism