Channeling Margaret and Helen
May 16th, 2012 by Kimberly
It’s been an emotional week already, and it’s only Tuesday. I can’t calm my nerves with food, because the scale has started to mock me. (I swear it and the bathmat whisper insults about me every time I turn my back.) I exercised this week until my legs literally shook – and yes, I understand the meaning of the word “literally” – and the scale told me I gained two pounds the next morning. I am seriously considering dropping it forcefully onto the concrete section of my yard, just to see how into how many pieces, precisely, it will shatter.
Okay, I’m stressed about a few things, and the scale didn’t cause most of them. (Maybe the two pounds was all muscle. Yeah, right. And the two pounds it added two days afterwards was the weight of all the love in the room.) The fact remains, binge eating is probably not a good answer to the problem, so where else can I turn? Several items would make good fodder for a blog post, but I’m too tired to think straight enough about them. Our president came out in favor of same-sex marriage, and a whole bunch of people hate him for it. A bank screwed up big time and people are talking about whether it might be a sign that they still don’t take fiscal responsibility seriously. (Ya think?) Our health care system completely sucks. (Trust me on this one.)
I try to look on the bright side, but how does one find a sunny spot in the midst of this oppressive gloom? With no energy to do research, I am forced to take on these issues Margaret and Helen style – with my opinion only. (Margaret and Helen = octogenarians who blog = awesomeness in Arial font.) Here goes. Let’s break it down.
1. Same-sex marriage. Sooner or later – and I’m betting on sooner – this is going to be legal. Whether you’re for it or against it, you need to accept that. If you’re for it, take a deep breath, and realize that it’s just a matter of time. If you’re against it, quit worrying about it. No one will force your church to marry gay people if you don’t want to. Many Catholic churches won’t let divorced people get remarried in their church. No one is forcing them to do it. Same-sex couples will be allowed to get married in the Unitarian church down the street. They let divorced people get married there too.  Unless you are gay, or you know someone who is and you really want to go to their wedding, this won’t actually affect your life in any way.
2. Banking recklessness. The people who run the big banks in this country will take risks with other people’s money. The government will let them. There are too many incestuous relationships going on there to expect otherwise. You can do something. Take your money out of Wells Fargo, Chase, Bank of America, etc. and put it in a credit union. Or under a mattress. Then, the next time J.P. Morgan announces that they made an oopsie with $2 billion worth of British stocks, it won’t make you quite as sad. Oh, you’ll still shake your head at the arrogance. But you’ll pop fewer Tums before the day is out.
3. Health care abominations. The health insurance business is just that – a business. They do not exist to get you well, they exist to make money. You will have to be your own loudest advocate in any medical care situation. Want to know the best way to stay healthy? Be nice to people and make friends. Less bitterness to eat away at your insides, and more love to make life a place worth living. Oh, and when you are sick and do have to deal with the health insurance business, it helps to have a caring friend willing to be your obnoxious champion when you’re too tired to do it yourself.
Okay, Helen Philpot has no worries about me taking over her column. But thanks for letting me vent anyway. I feel better. When the going gets tough, the tough blog. Or stare at pictures of puppies and kittens. It’s a toss-up.
Circumstances, like the weather, will change. What matters is that you keep moving – and make friends along the way.
Friends for life, or at least until the tuna runs out.
Kimberly will have facts to back up her opinions again next week, honest.
Wish I was there to give you a hug- zero calories!
Another great post- I agree with you on all points. Although I have not given up on the idea that we can make the world a better place… not saying you have either, just throwing the “can do” vibe out there!
Thank you, my dear. I’m sure eventually I will get back on the “we can do it” train – just can’t quite run fast enough to catch it right now! (Blame the sore leg muscles from Saturday’s hike.)
Facts schmacts. Kittens and puppies can, I hear, relieve nearly everything that ails.
This is, as usual, brilliant. You make me wish I agonized less and published more of my drivel.
xo
c
Get to it, Charlie! The world needs more drivel like yours.
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