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Orlando

One more. Fifty more. We haven’t even made it through June yet.

I just read a beautiful blog, one more reaction to the shooting in Orlando, written by blogger Maddison Wood, called oh, so appropriately, “I’m Tired.” Read it if you choose to.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to try to tell you what your reaction to this should be. Like Ms. Wood, I’m too damn tired. I don’t care how you feel about gun control or the LGBTQIA community or who gets to use which bathroom. I just saw the faces of 20-year-olds, people who will never hug their mothers again because someone ended their lives. I don’t have the energy to do anything right now but cry.

The only thing I will share is the response I left on her blog. I hope it brings her some comfort. It didn’t bring much comfort to me, but I am stronger with all of you than I can be by myself, so maybe sharing it with you will make the words better.

No words can fill the space. I don’t know how to fix the hate, and I am so very, very frustrated and you said it exactly, tired, tired in a way that sleep doesn’t help. But I will pray tonight that you get a good night’s sleep anyway, a good safe night’s sleep with no monsters in your dreams, that you awake to a day with no monsters in the news. That we all do. Deep down, we are all the same in that, needing to be loved, needing to be safe. Tonight I will curl up and cry into my cat’s fur, wondering yet again how someone can be so full of hate that killing somehow becomes right. Tomorrow I will try to put some love back in the world, but tonight I will cry. Again.

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